gUiLt sTrIcKen 

i have to sleep. i did not get enough sleep.
my eyes are tired but my mind is listless
i have worries, a lot of them are trivial
i do not worry about you no more
i know you are in a better place than me

you are still here i can feel you still
can you see me from there?
please forgive me i have let you down
please guide me so i can made it up to you
can you smile for me?
so i can be sure you heard me

i need to forgive myself soon
i won't be able to start living my life
knowing in my heart
i have pained you
how can i forgive me?
how can i forgive myself?
please tell me.